I’ve been wanting to write a blog post like this for a long time. Those that know me well recognize me as a self-help junky. As such, I genuinely attribute the largest portion of my professional development to the research, reading, and practicing of personal improvements I’ve done over the years. That, combined with years of professional experience, has taught me many lessons, some of which I’ve shared here. I assure you right beneath the surface of these life lessons is insight that will help you advance your career.
You’ll notice that while many items fall into categories of time, accountability, effort, and people, most are related to outlook and attitude—the two things that seem to transform everything.
Here are 34 Things Every 22-Year-Old Should Know
Let’s start with time, today, and the, uh, future you think you see…
1) Treat every day as if it’s the first day of the rest of your life or career. I don’t care if it’s not Monday or January 1st. The other six days of the week or 364 days of the year work too. This means you get to box up all your so-called failures as if they never happened. Unfortunately, this means you box up your successes too. The great news is that both of these actually cause strain which you can now let go. Every day technically is a new beginning.
2) Time is NOT money. Time is time. Money is money. Lose one and you can earn it back. Lose the other and it’s gone forever. Does that sound like they’re equal?
3) “Five-year” plans have ruined more present moments than all other distractions combined. You’ll be far better off with fifteen-minute plans. Not only will you be more accurate a far greater percentage of the time, but you’ll also rarely be disappointed in the outcome because you’ll have far fewer variables go awry. Stay present. You can only live life to the fullest in the moment. The past and future are mere distractions. Enjoy the job you have today. You’ll be happier and it’s a nice stepping stone for your future.
4) Learn how to say NO at the right times. The faster you learn this, the more happy days you’ll live and the more productive your workdays will become. Trust me.
Over time you’ll make lots of mistakes and “fail”… but, trust me, everything you want is on the other side of fear.
5) You’ll make a lot of mistakes in your life. You’re better off making those errors of commission rather than omission. When you look back, you’ll be much sorrier for the things you didn’t do as opposed to those you did. Along those same lines, it won’t matter much the choices you make as much as it will the conviction in which you make them. Be committed to everything you do. Take the job you want even if it’s “risky.”
6) Technically, I don’t believe there is any such thing as failure. Sure, the word itself is in the dictionary, but I’ve never noticed one in my life. Perhaps it’s because I don’t believe in what I look at. I believe in how I see it. Even so, I’ll play along…the embarrassment of failure is way easier than the responsibility that comes with success. If you think you can’t, you won’t. If you think you can, you will. Even if they don’t succeed, winners still think they did. It’s not delusional. It’s called mastering your psyche. Never be afraid to try to new things. Everything you want is on the other side of fear.
7) There is no such thing as failure—part two. The only exception to this rule is trying to please everyone. You will certainly fail at that. That rule is bulletproof. No exceptions.
All I need to do is pay attention and work hard and I’ll find the success I’m looking for. Right?
8) Open your eyes and stretch your ears. Something happens every moment. When you’re talking it’s impossible to experience the moment. It’s as if your brain shuts off when your mouth is moving. The only exception is screaming on the downslide of a rollercoaster ride.
9) I tend to notice two types of people—those that are disciplined and everyone else. 100% of the people in the first group eventually become successful. Some of the people in the second group do as well. Remember, what you do everyday matters more than what you do once in a while. Promotions don’t happen because of one big success.
10) Hard work doesn’t guarantee results. Smart work increases the likelihood of good results. Concentrate on what you do along the way and embrace the journey with no attachment to the outcome. You’ll enjoy yourself more and likely have better results. You’ll also avoid disappointments that could result from faulty expectations. Technically speaking, any outcome that didn’t occur the way you thought it would means you had faulty expectations. Faulty expectations arise for two reasons—you can’t see the future and you developed those expectations without all the necessary information. Don’t expect people to buy the best product. Don’t expect your boss to be fair. Don’t expect life to be fair.
11) Intelligence is overrated. Talent is really overrated. You only need three things to be successful—Passion, Vision, and Commitment. Contrary to what people think, you’re not born with passion. It’s grown. Vision isn’t seeing into the future. It’s making the future happen the way you want it to. Commitment is the most important item. It makes up for any shortcomings of the other two. Live every workday to the fullest. When it’s over think about how it’s moving you toward where you want to be. At any moment, don’t be afraid to change your career.
12) You can have endless dreams, but not endless priorities. It’s a great lesson for life, love, and upward management of your boss.
13) School does not equal education. Going to school helps you earn a degree. You know you have one when you can ethically place the letters after your name such as Andy LaCivita B.S.er of Everything. If you have to pay for someone to teach you something—anything—that’s not education. That’s paying for a degree or certification or whatever. Real education occurs when you do something you love for free or by the good graces of some employer and get paid for it. No one can teach you more than you. No one can teach you more than you. It was worth saying twice.
14) Own your stuff. Take accountability. The world would be an easier place to live if everyone did so. The word “fault” could be eliminated from the dictionary. That’d make me smile because then no one would be trying to assign it when they should first look in the mirror.
People make the world go ‘round. Sometimes you need them and sometimes you don’t. But, all the time, watch who you befriend…
15) You don’t need a mentor. No one cares about your life or your career more that you do. You can outsource a lot of things, but living your life isn’t one of them. Managing your career isn’t one either.
16) Leaders build more leaders, not more followers. “A” players hire and develop “A” players. “B” players hire and don’t develop “C” players. Protecting your turf might last for a while, but when your reign is over you’ll be far less developed for surrounding yourself with less talent. If you’re the smartest person in the room, go find another room.
17) Keep everyone’s phone number—even the people you dislike. They might be helpful someday. If given the choice between knowing the right person or having your MBA, remember that friends hire friends before they hire credentials.
18) Never treat your subordinates poorly. I assure you someday they will be working at company you’re trying to get into. It’s also possible that someday you’ll be reporting to one of them.
19) Here’s an average for you. You become the average of the five people you spend the most time with—especially at work. Think about that.
Even if you did nothing I previously mentioned, staying true to your instinct and keeping a positive outlook and attitude will set you in the right direction…
20) Apply the transitive property often. It will lead you to valuable deductions such as The More Things You Have In Your Life = The More Upkeep = More Stress AND Just Enough To Make You Happy > Never Satisfied = More Days You’ll Live Happily. Another one of my favorites is The More Bells & Whistles Your Product Has = The More Complicated It Is To Operate = The Less People That Buy It.
21) Always listen to your inner voice. It’s smart. It’s correct far more times than the external voices you hear. If the business deal sounds bad, it likely is. If it sounds good, but feels bad, it likely is bad too.
22) Everything is as it’s supposed to be. The sooner you accept that, the happier you’ll be. Everything that happens in your personal and work life caused you to do certain things—for good reason. Don’t believe me? Look back at your life or your career. I guarantee there is a pattern that connects the dots. If you’re not happy with the pattern, there are two things to consider. First, you’re probably not looking hard enough. Second, your future is spotless.
23) The more people who tell you something is wrong, the more right you probably are. The degree to which something is right for you usually is inversely proportional to the number of people who tell you it’s not. It’s also easier to believe a lie you’ve heard a thousand times than the truth you’ve heard once. Never hesitate to follow your instinct and create a path for your life and career. If it feels like a bad idea in your gut, it is. There’s also no need to confirm your gut with anyone else. Never feel the need to subscribe to one of society’s pre-canned menu options for life or work. We only grow as a society when people choose to be different. You’ll never grow as a person without doing the same.
24) You will be happy because of what you think not what happens to you. If you’re conditionally happy, you’ll have less happy days. My way, you’re happy every day. Happy people accomplish more, learn more, and are more fun to be around. Someone once asked me, “How can you be so happy so often?” I said, “Because I always think I’m happy.” I’m always right about that.
25) Experience doesn’t always lead to good judgment—gathering all the facts and making completely informed decisions does. Listening to another’s experience before you attempt something can be helpful. But, remember, when they did that something they did it without your one constant variable—YOU. Applying the transitive property that I love, this means that you can’t experience anything without actually experiencing it yourself. What makes you think the outcome would ever be the same when you insert yourself into the player’s seat? Different variables lead to different outcomes—better and worse.
26) Life isn’t always fair. Over the long run, however, the universe is incredibly balanced. Karma also has no deadline.
27) Patience is not a virtue. It’s learned. Don’t ever confused patience with being worn down or not caring. They’re not the same.
28) There’s no shame in quitting. Winners do it all the time. They just know the right time to move on. It’s usually right before things turn really sour. It’s also never before they’re about to a make a breakthrough. In that sense, timing might not be everything, but winners sure know how to set a clock.
29) You get back what you give off. Sending good things out into the universe and building a bank of goodwill is better than any checking account with a seven figure balance.
30) Comparison is a recipe for mediocrity. If your goal is to be “better than” someone else or you grade life on a curve, you’ll never reach your true potential because you’ll feel you’ve reached it when you’ve surpassed someone. Usually that only means you’re leaving something on the table. Comparison kills.
31) When giving or receiving advice, remember that advice is typically a person speaking to his or her younger self. For example, it took 30 items for me to realize my 46-year-old self is dispensing advice to my long-gone 22-year-old self. Oh. And, remember, free advice doesn’t cost you anything until you act on it.
32) Question everything. Not in an insubordinate but an inquisitive way. Once you know the “Why,” you’ve increased your chance of fixing the problem by 87695%.
33) Nothing is original. I’m sure anything I’ve just written has been written or dispensed before. Everything that needs to be said has already been said. We just need it repeated because no one was listening the first time. I think that happens because of this recurring dream I keep having. I’m driving down a highway and see the big green town road sign on the right as I zip past. The sign says, “Welcome To The Town of NO ONE CARES…Population 7 Billion.”
34) If you never try you’ll never know. Not knowing is my biggest fear. Only those willing to go too far can actually know how far they can truly go. Life was meant to be lived. Don’t wait until it’s too late to start.
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WHO IS THIS DUDE?
Andrew LaCivita is an internationally recognized executive recruiter, award-winning author, trainer, and founder and chief executive officer of milewalk and the milewalk Academy. He’s dedicated his career to helping people and companies realize their potential, consulting to more than two hundred organizations and counseling more than eleven thousand individuals. He often serves as a trusted media resource and is the award-winning author of Interview Intervention, Out of Reach but in Sight, and The Hiring Prophecies.
I love this, concise, to the point and irrefutable.
Glad you enjoyed it!
I just love this blog… Very nice work… Inspired me very much…Today I became 22 and I hope I will be able to maintain at least some of these really nice points 🙂
God bless!!!
Wow you’re 28 now!! Im bout to be 22. Hows life now im soo curious !
I’m twenty-two, trying to find my place in life, and this article has helped me see all I don’t need a place. I can do what I set my mind to do. No matter what age. Thank you. =)
That’s right Neve. Glad you liked it. Don’t ever forget that because the world will try to make you… 🙂
hi there we arenow in 2016 you are properly 25 yold its been 3 years from that time you read this blog im asking you is it real im 22 and i’m lost very lost in my life still studying no job nothing plz respond
Thanks for writing this, especially number 28.
So glad you liked it! And, yes, winners quit at the right time so they can move on to something better. 🙂
Very useful
Wow..this helped me a lot!! Thanks to you. I’m turning 22 next year, and im working since 18. This made me love my job even more and ill be exploring the world.
Im officially twenty-two today & it was blessed that I found this article on the right time. Num 17, I always remind myself to think positive to whoever come and make a mess in my life. Sometimes they keep on judging, but I keep in mind, its ok, maybe someday they need me or I need them instead. Not now, but maybe someday, right? So I would be glad if I can share your article on my blog. may I? 🙂
Hi Rosa, so glad you liked it! Of course you can share it and link to it!
yeay! Tqvm!
Wise words from a very wise man!
Thank you Jessica. Those that know me say I smile a lot, but your seven words planted my biggest smile today! Thanks so much for the kind words and I’m glad you enjoyed the post!
Absolutely great article. Most of us have been spoken to of this advise/insights you have scripted at least once in our lives as you said, BUT it’s up to us to listen and act upon. There is not one way of getting things done, but every way will require the right mentality. Very impressive blog.
i start to feel it (i am 21) especially number 5, i will try my best to do number 1, 2, & 24,
Some of the points, like the very last one, so true. I am currently 22 and honestly, afraid of taking risks. But your point makes sense, if you don’t try it you won’t know it.
Thanks I learned a lot from this. I’m 22 i want to be successful one day
I am almost halfway through turning 22 but I am glad I read this article today and now all my thoughts are confirmed here 🙂 Thank you…
Hi Andrew,
I just want to let you know that i’ve just turned 22 (13 April 2015), and the night before D-day i was very depressed, mad, angry and sad. Even i’ve tried to comitted suicide by strangled my neck with a thin scarf but deep down i am still unsure about it. Long story short, i gave a time to myself and googled “22 Years Old” – i’ve randomly clicked a link that appears to be your blog, i’ve read it from point 1 to 34. Holy God, “everything you want is on the other side of fear.” & “No one can teach you more than you” had left me speechless. It was my turning point and there’s a hope for me to stay alive.
Thanks Andrew, The Universe Bless you.
Rieza,
First of all, I hope your troubles are something you can overcome. Life is a blessing and should be lived to its fullest.
Thank you too for commenting and sharing your story. I’m thrilled I was able to help you in some way. I’m truly glad my words have helped you and others and it’s nice to hear that.
I also want to thank you for giving me inspiration to continue writing. Regardless of how much someone enjoys what they do, we all get tired from time to time and it’s sometimes difficult to find the energy to keep going. Whenever I need an inspirational boost, I’m going to look at your remarks. They will help keep me going. I hope mine keep you going as well!
I loved everything written in this blog. This really cleared my thoughts as well as it motivated me. Good work , thank you
Sakshi, thanks for the kind remarks! Glad you liked it!
This website certainly has all the info I needed concerning this subject
and didn’t know who to ask.
Glad to hear it!
#2 blew my mind. Thanks for sharing, Andrew!
Glad you liked it Acey!!!
Loved every second of this…heard some of them before, but I guess I wasn’t listening the first time. Ha! Thanks for sharing!
Thanks Melissa. So glad you found me and thrilled you enjoyed the post!!!
Pretty Good to Know at Any Age.
I’m struggling with Item 15 though, that we don’t need a mentor, even if I agree with the part that managing our career is our responsibility. As the people that I trust and have the highest regard for, are those that answered the questions I didn’t ask, but probably should have.
Like Item 19 says, we become the average of the people we spend the most time with. And this I’d say is where I’ve made my biggest mistake. I once heard it said that to become successful you need one hand reaching down to someone you can lift up, and the other reaching up to someone who can help you rise up.
I knew I could teach myself a lot, so I had both arms reaching down, to help others up.
And while a lot of people have appreciated that assistance, that lack of balance hurt me, when I needed some assistance too, that wasn’t there.
So further comments on this “we don’t need a mentor” point would be appreciated.
Thank You!
Bryon, first of all, thanks for reading and commenting. Regarding your mentor question…
Mentors are wonderful if you can find someone you trust and whose guidance is great. I think it’s more of a nice to have than an absolute necessity in life.
The reason I feel that way is that no matter what guidance someone can give you, your greatest life learnings and lessons will be the ones YOU LIVE rather than hear about.
While you might think you were hurt by not having proper guidance (or someone lifting you up as you put it), I’m guessing that you are a much stronger and wiser person for trying it on your own, making the mistakes, and then correcting them!!
Glad to have come to this blog. Thank you for this!
Charm, I’m glad you found it as well!
Am from Kenya n thats exactly wat i wanted to hear thanks…Jah bless
THANK YOU!
You’re very welcome!
Comment…from Kenya & boss u just nailed it what I was searching for… glad found this
Joseh, I’m glad you found me too!!!!
I am 22 turning 23 come June 18th. I was at the lowest point of my life and i just googled, “22 years old” and bumped into this amazing piece of work. It has changed my life and my approach towards life and I feel so motivated and inspired. Thanks a lot. I really needed this remedy and it just healed my soul. I’m never looking back again, never giving up on my dreams, never letting anyone look down on me and above all never comparing myself to others. A new beginning. Thank you Sir!!
Eric, you have no idea how happy that makes me to hear your thoughts. I wrote this post a few years back, but it continues to help people. Comments like yours, whenever they come in, give me motivation to keep going and keep helping others. For that, I thank YOU!
It’s a pity you don’t have a donate button! I’d most certainly donate to this superb blog! I guess for now i’ll settle for book-marking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account. I look forward to fresh updates and will talk about this site with my Facebook group. Chat soon!
Thank you! No donations necessary. I just hope you enjoy the articles and share them!
Thank u very much. U just gave me what I was looking for.
Thanks so much… I am turning 22 today!!
Awesome. Glad you liked it!
Thanks!!! I’m in my glorious twenties… so thanks again !!!❤
You’re welcome! Glad you enjoyed it!
Thank you so much.
You’re so well!!!
My son is struggling with life and is about to get married and has a heart of gold and tries to please everyone and walks around not really knowing what to do! I have been praying for my boy by the way just turned 22 and god sent me here! I sent it to him and he loved it and inspired him! Thanks so much for saying all the things a mother would like her son to know and be free to experience!
Mae! You are so welcome and I’m glad you enjoyed it!!!
Hi, just wanted to thank you for this list, I’ve seen hours of motivational videos and looked at many life guides. Nothing has yet summarized things better for me. I’m actually 18 but I really want to leave my mark on the world and this helped my path to getting less lost. The only thing I would add would be to Just Start, this is how one learns the quickest and saves the most time. The sooner you start, the sooner pieces start to fall in place. Thanks again, -Josh
Josh, so glad you enjoyed the post and thanks so much for your kind words. You are wise beyond your years and I’m sure you won’t have any trouble staying on the right path. I know you’re already on it. 🙂
Love love love this article! 20 minutes before reading I felt, depressed, discouraged, and unlike my usual self. Those feelings dawned on me when my 22 year-old self began comparing my life and its possessions to the successful middle/old aged people I work for and with… and even people in my office building. But this article was a wonderful reminder of why I don’t need to think or feel that way. Because I am AWESOME and doing great at 22 years old. Thank you again for this article. I have added to my “favorites” and plan to read often.
Emily, you made my day. So glad you enjoyed it!
Well, guess who’s 22 today?
Thank you for the piece.
Nice!
The BEST
Thank you so much Rais!
Yes! I’m twenty-two. A passionate dreamer. Looking for my dream to accomplish. But always got stuck in half-way of my every dream. This blog teaches me to accept myself and continue the path of hurdles. Even though it’s hard to start, it is less likely to succeed. Never quit at any time. I am glad to read this one. By the way, I am HS. Soon I will start my first blog. Hope you’ll see my stories.
I hope so too!
Today i’m twenty two.
I don’t know about my feeling.
I’m afraid, i’m happy, i’m proud and i’m sad too.
So i searched about twenty two years old and i found your blog.
It’s amazing ! I like your blog and i like your motivation.
I hope u can always write an amazing blog.
Thank you.
I’m so glad you found me! I will continue to do my very best for you!
I’m 22, almost 23 and I’m going through tough days. While I was reading each point I almost cried at work. You have no idea how much your blog has helped me. Thank you so much.
Jennifer, you have no idea how happy that makes me!!
Was reading your blog from last night up til now. Feeling so thrilled to hear these lines… I’m 22 and was feeling confused , but I now realise words of encouragement can help a person to get up after falling. But its up to that person to… I’m up now, thanks to u Andrew.
J.B. Outstanding to hear my friend!
I be 22 today and already have a job and wanted to study, have lots of planning, not much rest but mostly stay at home to avoid people, i live with my parents currently and bascjally grew up here in thid place that id Sydney in Au with them helping me.
Glad to chat your blog, I seem to be forward to more reliable articles and I think we all wish to thank so many good articles, blog to share with us.
You’re welcome!!!
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Am 22 turning 23 nxt year.am havn difficulties in makin decisions lik choosing a career nd d course to study nd strugglin wit readn habit….pls i need ur advice
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Thank you!
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Great to hear and glad you liked it!
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Thanks much!!!
Hey!am 22yrs…I have been touched personally,jst upon reading your amazing article point by point,i felt like i was slowly beginning a new life.I have had challenges when it comes to academics reason being I failed to cross into 3rd year @University level and everyone sees me to b a failure of which I don’t see myself.At the moment am at CROSS road in life but I thank the situation am going thru coz it will help me prepare emotionally on hw to overcome challenges at this early young age…Am been inspired each time I read your Article.Thankfully .
You’re welcome!!!
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It’s a great article but still I am hopeless to me….as I am 21 don’t do anything escape from everywhere ,talks to no one and yes nothing can let me up to deal with each day…I just shut up all time and do wrong deeds to others and after that thinks a lot about it…than again live like hell….
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I have also gone through your other posts too and they are also very much appreciate able and I’m just waiting for your next update to come as I like all your posts.
No one can teach you better than u can teach yourself, sir your words just gave me hope again, after thinking that I have totally lost my way in life,thank you dearly sir
Love to hear this Bibiana!!!
As I approach 22 next week I realized tonight I am constantly second guessing myself. I was scrolling through websites and I stumbled across this article. Life can be tough but only as tough as you make it. Andrew your article has given me some insight and a humbled feeling of serenity as I embrace the joy in heart I’ve been so oblivious to in the past. It’s so easy to get caught up in drama at work or at home this or that, verbal confrontations. I hope to carry with me the words I have read here moving forward so that I myself can be the best me, and I will use this inspiration to help set a better example for my son. I hope that you continue to help people. Even if it is just wity words. That is the kind of person I hope to be and you sir, just helped me open that door.
Many thanks
Luke
You’re welcome Luke!
Thank you so much!this article helped me a lot, I was hopeless,bored with life, depressed.. but after reading this I started regaining faith in life…be blessed!
That’s wonderful! You’re very welcome.
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Thank you so much for this post, am actually turning 22 tomorrow, and I am happy, scared at the same time with this pandemic situation going on. I feel like everything is on hold but hopefully with these great tips I hope to get back on my feet. Thanks.
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Thank you for these wise points, I turned 22 this year on March 7th, I also am a father to a 2 year old, and separated, so I’m all over the place as far self discovery goes.
Thank you for always touching our life’s in one way or another.
Looking forward for a better life
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Great insight,I turned 22 last December and have been admitted to the university taking BSC general.since this was not my desired course,I have just turned to Love it!. Actually developed passion and attitude and souring high.Thanks for this and May God bless you.i have also learned not to compare my life with others,Much love!!
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Thank you Mr. Andrew LaCivita, I wasn’t sure what to do, but now, got the answers and, I do have a DREAM Big Dream, once again Thank you for the guidance.
Great to hear! Best of luck and let me know how it goes!
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